Thursday, January 12, 2006

Professor Batty's Lecture To Young Men

...who are looking for a wife.
...the professor has prepared a list to help you along on your way to matrimonial bliss:

#1. Talk. Unless she really desires a Neandertal, speak up. Find some topic of conversation that is not: A. You. B. Sex. C. Money. You'll find that these subjects will be covered at length later, don't wear them out now.
#2. Listen. To what she says. Think about what she is saying. There is a pretty good chance you might actually learn something you didn't know. If you don't like what you're hearing, you've already learned enough about that person. Try again.
#3. Learn to cook, and feed her. Take a class if you have to. You will never regret it.
#4. Be sociable. Ties in with #1,#2,#3. The idealistic rebel quickly turns into a cranky loner.
#5. Wash your own clothes. You aren't Momma's boy anymore.
#6. Don't wash her clothes. Ever. You will ruin them.
#7. Clean the toilet. It's your turn...
More advice, at Flippism is Key.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

#8. Be nice to her cat. ;)

2:15 PM  
Blogger Joel said...

Works for me.

3:24 PM  
Blogger Kim said...

Amen about the clothes!!!!!

1:27 AM  

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